What Jesus is Like

4 Clowns
4 Clowns

Based on the example of Armstrongist leaders.

The New Testament claims that Christ lives within Christians. The Apostle Paul said to follow him as he followed Christ. We are to be like Christ. It is with this in mind that we choose to examine the character, behavior and personalities of the leaders in the Armstrongist community to find out what Jesus was really like.

First we examine Roderick Meredith. He sprang from Worldwide and formed the Global Church of God. He committed to abide by the decisions of his council of elders. He became miffed with them, left Global, bankrupting it in the process and defying the council, lying and breaking his word. Add to this that he has been a false prophet for at least 60 years and we have a more or less complete picture of Jesus based on the example of Roderick Meredith.

By this we can infer that Jesus is a vain arrogant liar who doesn’t keep his promises and does not work well with others. By this token, it would also be established that Jesus was a false prophet as ‘that prophet’ which we take to mean ‘that darn prophet’ or, if we were to believe Deuteronomy 18, ‘that damned prophet’.

Which brings us to today’s ‘that prophet’ Gerald Flurry. He claims to be Christ walking around in the flesh. What better place to learn what Jesus was really like than to actually follow the behavior of Gerald Flurry? Based on his being a false prophet, being rather toxic by his ‘no contact rule’ of people who don’t sit well with him, we can assume that Jesus, if not a beer bibber, was at least a wine bibber, a false prophet (there it is again), making claims to be something he can never be and treating people like worthless crap. We also would find Jesus something of a spend thrift, using other people’s money for self-aggrandizement in a building program not well funded with very little to show for it. Jesus said he would rebuild the Temple in three days. Gosh, it’s taken Flurry a lot longer than that and it seems to have cost a lot more. Will the loan be paid off for Ambassador Auditorium in our life time. If Jesus were like Gerald Flurry, he wouldn’t much care because it’s not his money, even though Flurry claims that tithes are God’s money that is to be given to Flurry — and a lot more besides. By that measure, Jesus is greedy. Flurry also claims to have ‘won’ the court case for the copyrights of the Worldwide Church of God when, in fact, he paid millions to get possession. So Jesus violates copyright laws, takes intellectual property without proper attribution, is near criminal but has bragging rights to literature he never wrote. I’m not liking this Jesus much up to this point based on the bad example of the Armstrongist leaders, but we have two more to go, so things may get better and straighten themselves out.

Straighten things out. Straighten things out. This brings us to Ronald Weinland. He is now serving a prison sentence for felony tax evasion and things will be straightened out in less than a year from now when he gets out of prison. How time flies. Ronald Weinland angered the Jury with his arrogance at trial. He thought he could spend tithe money any which way he wanted for his Luxury Fund. He bought three BMWs for his and his family’s personal use. He went on cruises during a financial crisis for his cult. He has a track record of being an insane lying false prophet psychopath. Gee, I’m liking this Jesus even less now — avaricious, prodigal, false prophet (again!), a man who angers people who want the truth, unjust and a criminal. If we were to assume that Ronald Weinland represents Christ then Jesus is definitely a felon. Several times over. Well, at least Jesus doesn’t have a penchant for Steuben Crystal.

David Pack represents Jesus. We know this because Pack told us so. He is the only one who has the truth. We know this because he told us so. David Pack also told us a while back that on a certain date, 3 leaders of prominent Armstrongist cult sects would die and all the members of the Cult of Herbert Armstrong Mafia would migrate en masse to David Pack’s compound, the Restored Church of God. He was rather nasty about it and supremely confident. It didn’t happen, of course, making him not just a false prophet, but making him a delusional false prophet. David Pack is also quite Draconian to his membership and those working for them. They provide him money and adulation — anything else, he doesn’t care about them — and he doesn’t particularly care if they are collateral damage in his little kingdom compound. He also considers himself as the greatest man who has ever lived. Many believe that he doesn’t take hot showers for fear he’ll steam up the mirror. He is extremely harsh and dismissive. Given all this, we should expect that Jesus practically hates his followers (as well as the rest of the world). Jesus doesn’t really care about others: Jesus is all about Jesus. We can ascertain that Jesus is also a delusional false prophet (that about nails it!) and we can’t possibly trust one thing he says. Jesus sees himself as the best and is totally devoid of any shred of humility.

We should not be at all surprised. Herbert Armstrong represented Christ. After all, he signed his letters “In Jesus’ Name” even if the letter was all about a prophecy that proved false later on (and sometimes false at the time the letter was written). Herbert Armstrong was vain, arrogant, had a nasty temper. Think of the example that sets in relationship to representing Jesus. Moreover, Herbert Armstrong committed incest with his daughter for 10 years as he began his ministry. This means that he did not know right from wrong. Even isolated societies across millennia never permitted such things, let alone celebrate someone who did such things as a guru, prophet or shaman. Herbert Armstrong could not even approach the morals, ethics and mores of society because he was totally warped and twisted. His evil caused a role reversal where his daughter became his ‘wife’ and his wife became the child. This is so perverse as to be beyond words to convey. Based on this terrible example, we would expect Jesus to be a vile pervert who could not be trusted even with his own family. He would be expected to betray people, especially his followers who trusted and relied on them. He would be expected to promote role reversals where the minister became the served and the members became the minister to serve him instead of the other way around. Herbert Armstrong was also an alcoholic boozer. He didn’t follow the rules he imposed on others, having eaten a donut and consumed a cup of coffee on the Day of Atonement ‘to keep up his strength’. He had armed body guards to protect him as he left his limo to go to the lectern at the Feast. He lived in luxury at the expense of others giving him blood money. With this, we expect Jesus to be a warped toxic demigod, subsumed with lusts and desires for nice things at the expense of others, addicted to alcohol, expecting to be served by his followers, above it all, violating all the rules at a whim, being quite arbitrary and totally unconcerned for his own family he saw only as a narcissistic source.

Somewhere in all this, that Jesus is about Redemption through his sacrifice to bring people to God the Father through self-sacrifice for eternal life has been lost. Also something about “Thou Shalt Not Take My Name In Vain” has lost momentum.

You must admit though, that as a talisman, Jesus has provided Armstrongist cult leaders with a heck of a good living at the expense of others.