The Herbie Virus

By John Ouvrier. Ex-WCG Pastor.

About a week or so ago, my buddy Bill (who contributes to the site) sent me the following humorous piece .  It’s called the “Amish Virus Alert.” It says:

“You have just received the Amish virus. Since we do not have electricity nor computers, you are on the honor system.  Please delete all of your files. Thank thee.”

We all may chuckle, but there’s a truth behind all this virus madness.  I’m fully convinced that many of these, long haired and bearded, virus creators are housed in some sort of medieval body cage that’s hung by a green, fungus coated, rusty, creaking chain that swings ominously from some antiquated, upper steel beam.  These fanatical creatures of virus software, who haven’t showered in months,  smell like acetone,  and hunk themselves forward while grunting at their computer monitors.  They then salivate over their computers, but in order to feed them, you must supply them food, by poking a piece of raw meat on a skewer between those rusty bars.  They growl, they chomp, and then, they eat.

We all know what a computer virus is.  It can be minimal, or it can delete all of our files.  In other words, our past records have gone “south.”  Was that not the EXACT same thing that we did as part of the Worldweird Cult?  We’re our minds not infected by Herbert W. Armstrong’s Virus?  Many who are possessed by the splinter groups are still swimming in that virus of confusion and mayhem.  It is those folks that our hearts go out to, and it’s them that we’d like to help.  It is not simply their hard drives that have been infected, but their inner minds and rational thinking.  Their logical reasoning has indeed gone “south.”

Please, let’s not make light of this, but any teacher, or pastor, or leader who demands unswerving loyalty to themselves and to their personal ideas of madness, is him (or her) self a living virus.  They’ve have – in effect – corrupted our hard drives – namely, our minds.  They have corrupted our brains.

Like most guys, I do the “channel flicking” thing on the remote, and every so often, I manage (regrettably) to hit a Meredith or a Flurry.  I made a big mistake over twenty years ago when I attended AC as a night student.  Meredith was the teacher, and I’d never heard so much claptrap.  I’d never heard so much nasal squeaking, and pharisaical repetitious bilge.  So one night after class, I challenged him.  I asked him if I could write a paper that was different to his thinking on one particular subject.  This was in his Epistles of Paul class.  His answer?  To my best recollection, he said:

“Well, if you want to do that and write your paper, then you can.  If you think you know more than me, then go ahead and write your little paper.  I’ve studied this matter for many more years than you, but if you think you know more than me, go ahead  . . . submit your paper.  If you think you know more than an Evangelist, then go ahead  . . . submit your paper.  Submit your paper, and let’s see how far it gets.”

So much for open mindedness.

Despite the abundant evidence that I showed, in that paper, I proved that this guy was “full of it,” he would not deny his pre-programmed Herbie Virus, and he gave me a B-.  I noted that NOT once could he prove his theory correct.  There were NO notes of his  to contradict what I’d written.  And this character is now leading a bunch of – Herbie Virus – infected folks who are molded in the Herbert W. Armstrong Virus technology.  “The blind leads the blind until they both fall into the ditch.”

Flurry also pops up on TV.  How people can listen to this total bore (personal opinion) is beyond my comprehension.  Yet he has a following, and its subsequent – Yummy – income.  He too, in my estimation,  is flowering and propagating the Herbert W. Armstrong Virus.  Emails to me have said that Herbert W. Armstrong’s name in the PCG is always revered, and dead Herbert W. Armstrong’s  teachings are inviolate.

While most computer viruses can be eliminated by a Norton or McAfee anti-virus program, this “religious” type of virus can be destructive to our minds.  It’s not removable by a simple program.  A computer virus can get onto our hard drive, but a brain virus can drive us – and our futures – crazy.  A computer virus creator seeks to create destruction to our equipment, but a Herbie (and similar) Viruses seek to dominate our lives, thinking, finances, and futures.  It seeks to control our lives, and rule over us with “ . . .a rod of iron.”

“Don’t rush to be teachers,” it was once said.  But, I was too dumb to listen to that simple instruction.  I once – regrettably – taught the virus.

What drives a computer virus creator?  It gives him/her a certain amount of power.  He or she can disrupt your lives, and create havoc with your computer.  That’s a symbol of their power.  They enjoy having that power over us to mess up and make mayhem with our lives.  And the Herbie Virus character fits the same mold.  They want power too.  And the bottom line of it all?  Ego.  Hitler had a super ego.  Stalin had a super ego.  Mao had a super ego.  Pol Pot had a super ego.  Herbert W. Armstrong was also known to have a super ego.  And Herbert W. Armstrong’s cultmasters are charging in that direction.  Good luck guys.  Welcome to totalitarianism.

By this time, everyone who is “out” is really “in,” according to a saying Dave Antion once said.  Herbie’s virus was ruled by his insatiable ego.  “Look what I’ve done,” he once bragged to an old biz friend.  Ref:  The AC REPORTS.   A virus can be a madness, and unless checked in its early stages, it can be devastating to all those involved.  This is why I lay the blame heavily on Herbert W. Armstrong’s lieutenants.

Although the Matthew 18:14-17 tact is Biblical, its principles are still sound, and are often used in honorable businesses today.  Namely, you first approach the offending party, and if that doesn’t work, you bring two or more who think the same way.  From everything I’ve gathered, no one among Herbert W. Armstrong’s whores had the guts to do that.  In the end, it would have solved immense problems, salvaged peoples lives, their incomes, and their retirements.  But the lieutenants appeared to be gutless.  They had their own incomes to protect, and seemingly:  “The hell with anyone else.”

There were so many that KNEW that the tithing “law” was a obsolete one, and meant only for the Mosaic era.  But, no one had the guts to speak up.  Les Mac once told a group of us that:  “I believe in tithing, but ONLY the first tithe.”  Yet now, the UCG (Ugly Church of Greed) preaches more than that one tithe, and how “wonderful” was the Feast of Tabernacles in so-and-so, etc., blah, blah  . . . .  So, it appears that they were all infected with Herbie’s virus.  Anyone who could read the Bible with an open mind could see that there was NEVER ANY SUCH THING AS THIRD TITHE.  And tithing is NOT any sort of requirement.  The Pasadena contingent knew that, and I was told (after I left) that many chose to keep their wimpy mouths shut, because of a generous paycheck and perks.

Ask any of those former “evangelists” as to how much THIRD TITHE money went to decorating their homes.  Many of their arrogant wives used to love the “favored” of the congregation to come into their luxurious homes, and listen to those Evangelist wives brag:  “See how I decorated this place?  Look at what I’ve done.”  Yakkety Yak, on and on, etc.  Of course, what they didn’t say, is that they had a professional decorator come in and design the opulence, and the money came directly from a THIRD TITHE that never existed under any covenant whatever.  The congregation were being scammed.  I invite any contenders, prove me wrong.

At least two of these people live on Waverly Drive in Pasadena, CA, which is one block south of Del Mar Blvd., which boarders the once campus of “God’s College.”

However, it certainly appears that these (and many others) sponges drank liberally of the third tithe, feathered their own nests, and became more enmeshed in the Herbert W. Armstrong Virus.  Let’s face it, those perks were hard (if not impossible for some) to give up.  Even if it meant doing the right and honorable thing, they chose to ignore that fact, then they went their own way, and of course: “Pass the Dom Perignon.”  Glug!

However, although dead Herbert W. Armstrong now lies rotting in a fitting place, the Virus continues.  I personally cannot believe that – at this time – with all the info available, that Herbie’s Virus has NOT been purged.  His theology was mayhem – for any of us that wants to use an open mind.  Eventually, thousands did.  Obviously those who teach this stuff have not learned (or are deliberately ignoring) the lessons of what he plagiarized from the CG7 group and anyone else convenient.  Check out the CG7 doctrines at:  http ://www.cg7.org/home.html   As time went on, he was fed with other ideas, as he appeared to have none of his own.  He preached them (like “new” teaching about D&R.  Other groups knew of this “new” teaching for years.) as if “God” had suddenly revealed them to Herbert W. Armstrong alone, and any past mistakes were simply a “testing” of God’s people.  So, we were told, to thereby – adhere. But this man was a theological ignoramus, and was never educated in any viable area as far as our as our records show.  This is not to exalt or diminish any form of education, but “by their fruits” you can certainly know this scam artist for what he was worth.

Obviously it appears more profitable for his offspring to cling to the “ole’ time theology of Apostle Herbie,” as most of his teachings were a mish-mash of anything he could observe through his (reportedly) clouded mind.  One former evangelist told me that if once the Armstrongs (namely Herbert W. Armstrong & Teddy) got some wacky idea into their heads, they would covet it, coat it with their own personal saliva, and preach it as if “God” had revealed it to them personally.  It certainly shows that they too, had never done their homework.  Maybe, with one exception, and that was in the area of $$$$.

It’s a tragic and regrettable thing that the Herbie Virus is still active.  I cannot keep up with the Herbert W. Armstrong WANNBES.  Their ego reigns supreme in so may of the would-be Herbies, and who are infected with the seemingly incurable Herbie Virus.

Please, let’s all keep the hard drive of our mind clear, and use the anti-virus of common sense.  Regrettably, there are thousands out there who are still brainwashed, and will stay that way, until they have the guts to honestly LOOK at the truth.  After all, what harm can it do?  If a thesis is wrong, then it’s wrong.  But any of us can examine the evidence.  Examining, proving, and checking everything is the mainframe of common sense.  But, so many of the ex-Worldwide Church of God are scared of doing this because their cultmasters have them totally bonded in fear.   Please remember, ignorance leads to fear.  Congregations are NOT allowed to examine any truth for themselves.

We are here to help and not only to point out the problems.  If we can help, then let us do it.  If you need help, a friend, or even someone to chat with, then please email us.